Why do I deal with you?
by The Futile Vinny
Summary: I suck at summaries... It's a crack fic, and Yuffie is doing very stupid stuff... but what does Vincent do? Rated T for language.
1. Chapter 1

**This is so messed up... if you read my Shugo Chara fanfic, you would know that I write crack stories... and I will keep up with that until my mind gets straightened out and I don't feel like I am messed in the head…**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Vincent or Yuffie, but I DO own the creative plot xD**

:::O:::

I woke up to a very obnoxious slurping sound filling the ship. I dragged myself out of my coffin and trudged over to the kitchen down the hall where I saw Yuffie hunched over, with a spoon in hand and a glass bowl in front of her.

"What are you doing?" I groaned as I peered over her shoulder to see the bowl was filled with a creamy brown liquid, most likely chocolate milk. In her right hand, she was holding a spoon.

"I'm drinking my chocolate milk like you would drink soup broth, _duh_! It's not _that_ complicated Vinny!" She rolled her eyes with a smirk and slurped the milk off of the spoon.

"Why do I even let you live here?" I mumbled to more to myself than to her.

"I'unno, because you love me?" She said sweetly. Grumbling, I rubbed my temples as I made my way out of the room.

:::O:::

Later that day, I heard loud banging coming from the kitchen, along with a long strand of swears. Although I knew who it would be, I still made my way towards the source of the noise to find Yuffie trying to stab a potato chip... with a fork. Smacking my claw to my forehead, I silently shook my head in disapproval before she turned to face me.

"What? These are _potato_ chips, and you eat _potatoes_ with a _fork_, don't you?" She asked rhetorically before shattering the chip with her fork. In frustration, he threw her fork across the room, where it lodged itself in the wall.

"Fucking ass! Damned potato chip won't mother shit on my fork worth fuck!" She yelled at the crumbled mess on the counter before storming out of the room. A few seconds later, the sound of her door slamming shut echoed throughout the ship.

_Why do I even deal with her?_ I questioned myself before slowly making my way towards the bridge.

:::O:::

**Yeah... told ya'.**

**So... this came to mind 'cause I actually did this. I could see Yuffie doing this as well, so I substituted me for her and my brother for Vincent.**

**So please, R & R? c:**


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay.. thanks for the one review! *throws confetti***

**Anyways.. this was originally supposed to be a drabble… but someone wanted me to write more.. and that one person was the only one who reviewed. Woo!**

**Thanks for the review DevilAngelResa18 !**

**I don't know how long this story is ever going to be… but I might take a while to update.. seeing as I am currently writing a story for a roleplay I did on Habbo xD**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy, I just own the plot to this xD**

:::O:::

"Woooohoooo!" A female's voice rang from outside in the hallway. Every second that passed, the voice seemed to be getting louder and louder. I peered through the doorway to see Yuffie running towards me holding something in her hand, waving it around wildly in the air. I was going to question her but only a mere second later, I saw Cloud chasing after her.

"Hey Yuffie, that's not cool! Give it back!" I glanced back at the object in her hand. It seemed to be a baby blue blanket with white, fluffy clouds all over it. I tried to hold back my laughter as I saw tears stream down his face. "My mom gave me that! It's special!" He whined. Yuffie didn't seem to care, she just kept running. _What has been up with her lately? She seems more obnoxious than usual… Maybe it's time for her to get therapy.._ Just as the thought crossed my mind, she tripped and began tumbling down the stairs. After closing the door, I turned around and went on with my day as if nothing had happened. _But seriously… why is she even here?_

:::O:::

Last night, I had thought about what to do with Yuffie. If she did one more of her stupid, obnoxious stunts… I planned on kicking her off this ship and sending her to rehab. It's just not… safe for my sanity? to have her here anymore. I figured all the other passenger would be thanking me for getting rid of that annoying, wannabe ninja… especially Cloud. At that thought, I had to try not to laugh again. I mean seriously.. who would have predicted that? Not me.. that's for sure.

_Hmm… Now what am I going to do with Cid…?_

:::O:::

**Yeah.. That's the end of the chapter. I have completely run dry of ideas… well for now anyways. **

**I am not sure if I will post another chapter. This might be the end… * Wipes tear from eye* UNLESS-! You want to give me ideas :D You know.. tell me what you want to read in the next chapter. So kind of like a fan service. **

**Okay, thanks for reading and please R & R ( Rate & Review)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Yippie! Chapter 3! And I got 2 more reviews! YAY! *Throws 2 times as much confetti***

**Thanks for the reviews! I really appreciate them :D**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy, or the story line, my brother, Grargll, gave me the ideas, I just turned 'em into a story :D**

:::O:::

"Hey Vinny, need anything to be washed?" Yuffie asked me in a very serious tone. I looked at her, confused. I was trying to figure out if she was just trying to prank me by doing something with my clothes.

She walked into my room uninvited and grabbed the basket of dirty clothes from the corner of my room and left. I was going to follow her and try to stop her, but a part of me thought it would be alright.

An hour later, I heard my door open. I turned to face Yuffie. She looked either upset, or scared, I am not sure. I was curious as to what she wanted, or better yet.. what she had done to my clothing. It took 2 minutes of just staring at each other for her to finally talk.

"Um, Vinny? I kinda … maybe…" She trailed off, looking around the room as if trying to think of a way to get off the topic or get away.

"You 'kinda, maybe' what?" I asked in an irritated tone.

_Silence._

"I kinda, maybe.. bleached your poncho. I'm sorry, don't hurt me!" She yelled as she darted out of the doorway and down the corridor. It took a moment to dawn on me.

"You bleached .. my poncho?" I repeated slowly. "Wait, I don't have a poncho, it's a cape! And you _bleached it_?" I swiftly walked down the corridor, towards the laundry room. There hung my cape… and it was white! I don't wear white! I could feel the anger boil inside me. _I can't wear a white cape…. _

I dashed down to the kitchen area with my cape, only to find Red XIII. _**Good**__** enough**__. _I felt Chaos rise and soon it was out of my control. Chaos ripped Red XIII to shreds without any effort, making sure all of his blood landed on the cape.

After finishing, I walked towards my room, red cape and all.

:::O:::

_I need to think of a way to get rid of Yuffie. _I thought to myself. _Maybe I could throw her out of the window. Who cares about her seeing a psychiatrist? That would mean she can come back. So defenestrating her sounds like a great idea. While she's in the hospital from broken bones, I can think of a better way to kill her!_ I smirked to myself.

_Now, about getting rid of Cid… still need to think about that…_

:::O:::

**Tada~**

**Bold + Italics = Chaos' thoughts :D**

**Okay, so tell me what'cha think in a review :D**

**If you have an idea of how you want the next chapter to go, tell me in a review.**

**Please R&R ( Rate and Review)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hello :D**

**This is the… fourth? chapter of this used to be drabble :S**

**Anyways, I am losing ideas, so give me some! D:**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy, or Mika. :D**

:::O:::

"I said, sucking too hard on your lollipop or love's gonna get you down. I said, sucking too hard on your lollipop or love's gonna get you down~" Yuffie sang as she danced down the hallway towards my room. All of the sudden my door swung up and there appeared Yuffie, headphones in her ears and a big grin on her face. She stepped closer to me. Still grinning, she put a hand on my shoulder. I stared at it for a second before return my gaze to her.

She opened her mouth and said in a very serious tone, "Hey Vinny, stop sucking too hard on that lollipop, or love's gonna get you down…" before she took her hand off my shoulder. It took a moment for what she said to register in my mind. I growled. She turned on her heels and bolted out the door. I grabbed Cerberus and followed after her. _That's it, no more Yuffie!_

****:::O:::

**Okay, so this might be the end, unless someone tells me that they want it to continue. On that note, tell me what you fricken' want to happen people! Please and thank you :D**

**I will dedicate that chapter to you and throw more confetti, maybe even streamers :D**

**Please Read and Review ( R &R)**


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you to ALL the people who reviewed :D I love you guys for reviewing ;)**

**Anyways a SPECIAL thanks to xXLeavitt Dante-x-AmberRAWRXx for helping out with the story so much :D Well this chapter but still :D * Throws 5 tons of confetti* Woo! … Wait.. Now who's going to clean this up…**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy, or this plot line**

:::O:::

_Okay that's it! I am going to go Chaos on her ass! _I thought to myself as I chased a very bubbly Yuffie down the cracked road. She turned a corner into an alley. Once she reached the end of the path, she turned around to face me, her features dropping into a scared look. I could hear her choppy breathing get louder when I held Cerberus up to her temple.

"You have been nothing but a pain. Tell me why I shouldn't kill you right now and relieve everyone of you and your annoyances." I said in a cold tone. I heard her gulp. It seemed like she was trying to gather the courage to speak up. She finally opened her mouth and moved the gun away from her head.

"That's simple, Vinny McVinster. There's…" She trailed off and looked away but I had already seen the hint of pain? No… sorrow… in her eyes. I knew my words hurt her.. but it had to be said. It didn't seem like she could think of any good reasons to stay alive due to the fact she didn't speak.

Moments passed before I finally heard that cheerful voice of hers, " Let's see ~ I am your friend. I wanted to have some fun.. if you kill me, I won't be able to take care of you… also.. I wanted company, and seeing as you were in that coffin for like… 30 years? I thought you would want company too.. I guess what I did wasn't very cool. I _was_ just an annoyance.. That's what mom said, too, before she left me…" I could see her eyes tearing. I was speechless. I turned my head to get away from the guilt I got when looking into her heartbroken eyes.

"Yuffie…" I turned back to meet nothing but the wall. I looked around only to hear a feminine giggling and a 'Up here Vinny!' I hesitantly looked up and regretted it immediately because my face met some month old sushi… and by the smell of it.. dog droppings…

" YUFFIE!"

:::O:::

**Tada~ Thanks so much Amber :D**

**This story is great, never would have happened without ya :D**

**Want another chapter? If so.. Tell me in a review. If you _don't_ want another chapter… tell me that it is good the way it is now and adding to it will only make it boring xD**

**Please Read and Review ( R&R)**


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